Pause.

For a woman this can be extremely difficult. Women are ‘doers’ we notice the small things, the big things and everything in-between.  We find it hard to sit still, or is that just me?

We understand the benefits of rest just at certain times it’s difficult to carve out that time so we push through seeing and doing what constantly needs to be done however this can lead to a whole plethora of issues that maybe I will leave for another time but one that comes to mind is burnout.

Todays’ blog isn’t about pausing in the way you might think; it’s a conversation long overdue and one I am opening in a series of conversations to highlight that ‘the pause’ i.e. perimenopause/menopause and as the definition defines; interrupted action this pause is a massive directional change in life as you know it.

The “pause” is both incredible for a woman but also somewhat soul destroying. Navigating your way through this female condition is challenging especially if you are not aware of what you are going through.  Ignorance is bliss until you start to recognise the imbalance of your emotional self along with body composition.

The start

The menopausal transition can be gradual with the transition starting noticeably with changes in the menstrual cycle; from experience you think nothing of this other than an irregular month, that’s normal right? However, this is often the start of ‘perimenopause’ which can last several years and not only affects your periods (physical) but emotional, mental, and social well-being.

For me changes in my periods started around 5 years ago, I had been on the contraceptive pill (for skin correctness as opposed to birth control) and didn’t have a period from 2012 to 2017; after going off the pill my periods started back regularly for around 1 year before I went months without a bleed.  Fast forward the 5 years and I on average get my period now around 3-4 times a year.

Menopause is recognised when you have gone 12 consecutive months without menstruation, this marks the end of your ovarian follicular function i.e. the ovaries stop releasing eggs for fertilisation. I very much choose to live in the present moment but when it comes to the ‘pause’ I am willing the 12 month break on – it would just be somewhat comforting to know, I can wear white again with confidence!

Too young to be old

I’ve not consciously noticed myself ageing until quite recently (and really compared to a 100-year-old I am not old). The journey through life has been somewhat young with a sense of openness and freedom to life contributing to this ageless mentality.

I started travelling at 21, lived overseas for 8 years and then returned to Australia residing and working in Sydney and Melbourne over a course of 17 years before returning to my home city of Adelaide 25 years later. A long-time renter I didn’t have the responsibility of owning a house and choosing not to have children well, life has been somewhat lacking in responsibility. I did choose to get married because I wanted to big party but didn’t follow the traditional life plan of finishing school, going to university, having a professional career, getting engaged, married, having kids, getting a dog, and then buying a house with a white picket fence.

Homies

At the age of 48 and 50 respectively, my husband and I purchased our first house. The drive for ownership wasn’t fierce until we decided to move back to Adelaide and settle or better put, really laydown some roots.

On return to Adelaide, namely the Adelaide Hills life around us became a little smaller, quieter, and slow. I feared I was too young to leave the big smoke and bright lights of South Melbourne behind me again, not feeling the age my driver’s licence or most people around me told me I was.

Life begins at forty

Turning 40 was an interesting one, this is when I ran my first 100km endurance run but most people thought I should be almost one foot in a grave. I may have been 40 but life was just beginning; I was what felt like, in the prime of my life. Upon further thought, at 27 I was in the prime of my life but again, I’ll leave that story for another day.

Society tells us how we should feel at a particular age and fortunately for me, I choose not to listen but when I become aware of ‘the pause’ I had a sudden realisation, that maybe I wasn’t as young as I thought I was. I was ageing and my body was giving me the signs in which the mind was choosing to ignore. The fight had begun.

Sharing stories

The dialogue surrounding perimenopause and menopause has picked up significant momentum in recent years, particularly within the realm of ultra-endurance athletes. As a coach, I’ve worked with numerous women who have faced challenges understanding why their motivation has decreased and why they’ve noticed physical changes leading to a slower pace.

While I’m not an expert on hormonal changes, I speak from personal experience as someone who is currently navigating this phase. My journey has been both enlightening and uncomfortable. I refrain from comparing my experience to others, recognising that each person’s journey is unique. I find myself in the midst of the storm, patiently awaiting its passing.

The scope of this topic is broad, with a multitude of experiences and symptoms. This blog serves as part of a series, so please stay connected as I have much more of my story to share.